Love Serenade
by Dragon MoonX
Summary: A collection of short stories and drabbles featuring one of my favorite pairings - Bellatrix/Kefka. Will contain various genres, such as humor, romance, hurt/comfort and horror.
1. Bubble Bath

**Love Serenade**

Disclaimer - I'm not Rowling and I don't own her characters, nor do I own any of the Final Fantasy characters.

Chapter 1 - Bubble Bath

A/N: this takes place during Heartless Angel, when Bellatrix first meets Kefka and is trying to nurse him back to health. Emphasis on the word "trying".

After spending several days in bed, sick and miserable from the countless experiments performed on him, Kefka's health began to slowly improve. His physical health, that is. His mental health, on the other hand, seemed to continue its gradual downhill decent into the land of no return.

After a while Bellatrix decided that it would be a good idea to give Kefka a bath. He'd been burning up a with a fever, and his body was sweaty and sticky with filth from not bathing. She filled the bathtub with cool water, testing the temperature to make sure it wasn't too cold, then walked into the bedroom and pulled the covers back on the bed.

Kefka, who was sleeping in a semiconscious daze, barely noticed when Bellatrix lifted him out of bed and carried him to the bathroom. He was still feverish and hot, and a cool bath was just what he needed to refresh his senses. Unfortunately, it refreshed him a little too well, for the minute she stripped his clothes off and sat him in the tub, Kefka came alive with a series of furious shouts and swears.

"Cold!" he screeched in his high pitched voice. "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold! What the hell are you doing, Bella?"

"I'm giving you a bath, you idiot. What does it look like I'm doing?" She picked up a cup and used it to pour water over his head, getting ready to wash his hair for him.

"I'm perfectly capable of bathing myself," said Kefka, shivering as the cool water trickled down his back and shoulders. He then looked down and noticed that the tub was full of bright pink bubbles. "Bubbles?!" he exclaimed. "I'm a Magitek Knight, a superior being greater than all those that have come before me. How am I supposed to strike fear in the hearts of my enemies when I'm sitting here surrounded by fucking bubbles?"

"You're not supposed to be striking fear in the hearts of anyone right now," said Bellatrix, squeezing some shampoo into the palm of her hand and massaging it into his scalp. "You're supposed to be concentrating on getting better."

She scrubbed the filth out of his blond hair, then filled the cup and started pouring more water over him.

"Bellatrix!" Kefka shouted. "Did you not hear me when I said that shit is cold?"

The crazed witch had had enough of his profanity laced outbursts. She put her hand on his head and shoved him under the water, holding him under for several seconds before pulling him out by the hair.

"Are you done whining, Kefka?" she asked.

Kefka glared at her, his long hair plastered to his scalp and his cheeks filled with sudsy bath water. A stream of water flowed from his lips as he spit the water out, still frowning and looking most displeased, but at least he was quiet now.


	2. Dancing Mad

Chapter 2 - Dancing Mad

A/N: this was inspired by Kefka's habit of bending over and slapping his rear to taunt his opponents in FF Dissidia. I've had the image of him doing this stuck in my mind for days, and it won't go away until I write it.

Sometimes being completely out of your mind had its perks. Kefka often laughed and told Bellatrix that it meant he could do anything he wanted, such as screaming death threats and obscenities at everyone in sight. And because they knew he was crazy he could get away with it.

"People don't take me seriously," he said. "They think, 'oh, pay no attention to Kefka, he's just off on one of his lunatic rants again.'" He said this in a mild, casual tone, discussing his insanity with Bellatrix as though he were making plans for a Sunday afternoon picnic. "Which is why I like to surprise them, keep them on their toes, make them wary of crossing paths with me."

A smile spread across his lips, and Bellatrix knew right away that he was planning something. She pawed at the red and yellow ruff around his neck, the way she always did when his talk of death and destruction was turning her on. "I love how calm you are when discussing what you're going to do to these poor fools," she said.

"Yes, well you see, Bella, I've always thought that, as long as one can talk sanely about madness, they aren't that far gone. I know exactly what I'm doing. I just don't care is all."

Later that evening as the sun set over the Imperial Palace, people began to gather from faraway to attend the thirty first annual Imperial ball. This extravagant party drew people in from as far away as Jidoor, with the wealthy citizens of this high class society joining the upper class members of Vector for an evening of food, music and dancing.

Emperor Gestahl sat beside general Leo, a glass of wine in hand as he watched the gathering of people enjoying a pleasant evening together. The lull of general conversation and light background music had gone uninterrupted for the last three hours, with everyone enjoying themselves as well as the food and beverages provided by their host.

Gestahl leaned over in his seat, and whispered in Leo's ear, "You haven't seen any sign of him yet?"

Leo shook his head. "No, sir, I have not. Perhaps he is ill and will not make it this evening."

"How can you be so sure of that?" asked the emperor.

"Well, he was complaining about having a stomachache this morning at breakfast. He then fled the dining hall without finishing his meal."

Gestahl leaned back in his seat, taking a moment to ponder Leo's words. The physical symptoms of Kefka's illness had subsided after he returned from the wizarding world. There were still times when he experienced fevers, tremors and occasional blackouts. But the majority of his health issues seemed to have gone away now that he was no longer being used as the Empire's personal lab rat.

Still, he doubted that Kefka would pass up an opportunity to cause some sort of mischief and mayhem. And if he was feeling sick again, that was usually a warning sign that he was on the verge of going on another one of his murderous rampages.

Sometimes the emperor wondered if he had done the right thing, allowing Kefka to be used as a test subject in Cid's experiments. He knew what Kefa was capable of, he knew the signs that Kefka was about to lose it, and often turned him loose on the enemies of the empire at the exact moment when his rage reached its peak and was about to explode in a firestorm of violence and death.

Kefka was a monster, but was he any better, setting the deranged man loose to run wild in the streets like some rabid beast that craved blood and destruction? He looked over at Celes. She did not share in Kefka's torment. She hadn't been subjected to the same torturous acts that had shattered Kefka's mind. She was both strong and mentally stable, with no signs of the madness that plagued her fellow Magitek Knight.

His thoughts were interrupted when a wicked cackle filled the air. He and Leo both looked up, their eyes wide, as Kefka suddenly materialized atop one of the tables in the ballroom.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen," said Kefka, smiling at the people in the room. "So good to see you here, because we have some fabulous entertainment for you this evening, brought to you by the finest performer the empire has to offer."

Leo covered his face with his hands and groaned. "Oh no, here we go again."

Bellatrix was waiting in the wings, watching as Kefka spun around on the table and shouted at the band leader, his high pitched voice carrying across the room.

"You there, play something with a good beat so I can shake my booty!" he cried. The band leader hesitated, and Kefka conjured a ball of fire in his right hand. "Did you not hear me? I said play!"

A lively tune filled the air as Kefka laughed and dissolved the fireball in his hand. Leo and Gestahl then watched as he plucked the feathers from his hair, pulled back his flowing cloak, and tucked them down the back of his red and blue pants, making him look like he had sprouted a feathery tail.

"Yoo-hoo, Bella, darling!" Kefka called out, bending over on the table and playfully slapping his butt.

"Oh, dear god, no," moaned Gestahl.

Bellatrix laughed at Kefka's childish display as he wiggled his feathery rump, dancing and swirling his bum in circles while the music played.

"This has got to stop!" said Leo, rising from his seat and running towards the table Kefka was dancing on.

Kefka shook his butt, laughing as the music played. He kept on dancing, even as Leo neared the table and started shouting at him, demanding that he stop. He waited until Leo got close, then kicked up his heels and cracked him in the nose with his foot, sending the general reeling as he fell backwards clutching his bleeding nose.

Bellatrix laughed harder when she saw Leo back away, blood streaming from between his fingers. She bent over double, laughing until her sides hurt, then looked up to see Kefka humming a pleasant tune, a broad smile on his painted face as he started using more provocative movements to get her attention.

Her eyes widened at the sight of him running his hand down the front of his multicolored shirt, past his stomach, and over his groin, all while rocking his hips forward and back, his feathers waving to and fro with the rhythm of his body. With his free hand he beckoned her, the seductive smile on his face calling to her from across the room.

The people in the room stared at him, a few of them snickering and giggling at the sight of this man, dressed in brightly colored jester's clothing and dancing on the table.

Leo tried again to stop him, but Kefka leapt up into the air, laughing as he came down on the general's back just as Leo dove across the table at him. He tap danced on the unfortunate general's back, and a few of the people in the crowd started to laugh. Surely this was some sort of scripted performance that was scheduled to play tonight.

Before Leo could recover from being stomped on, Kefa jumped off the table and ran to where Bellatrix was waiting in the wings.

"That was brilliant!" Bellatrix cheered, bouncing up and down like an excited child. She threw her arms around him, kissing him on his painted lips.

"I'm glad you enjoyed my performance, darling," said Kefka when they finally came apart. "Now all we need is to go out with a bang!" He then spun around, hurling a bolt of lightning through the air where it struck the chandelier in the center of the room.

The chandelier exploded, raining shards of glass down on the people below, as electricity crackled and arched through the air above their heads. The exposed wires sparked and flames leapt from their severed ends, just as Bellatrix and Kefka ran from the room, their laughter following them as they disappeared down the hall.


	3. Thoughts About Turtles

Chapter 3 - Thoughts About Turtles

 _Written for Lamia's Daily Speed-writing Competition_

 _Prompt - turtle_

A/N: this was a random plot bunny that just came out of nowhere, along with the mental image of Kefka on his belly in the sand, poking a turtle as it crawled past.

* * *

A warm breeze was blowing over the sands surrounding the kingdom of Doma, lightly tugging the feathers in Kefka's hair as he lay on his belly, propped up on his elbows with the upper half of his body outside his tent. He was bored, hot, and grumpy. The heat was making him sweat, which made his makeup run in spots around his cheeks and forehead.

He watched as a turtle crawled out of the nearby river, and made its way towards the entrance of his tent. As the turtle neared his tent, Kefka started poking at it. He prodded its legs and back, a frown on his face as he watched the creature retract its head into its shell.

Bellatrix came over and sat down next to him, watching as he poked the helpless turtle then flipped it over onto its back, just to watch its legs flailing in the air as it struggled to right itself. "Having fun, Kefka?" she asked.

"Not really," he said. "These things are ignorant and boring. What good are turtles anyway? You can't train them to attack and kill anything. And turtle soup is one of the foulest substances known to man."

"I'd love to see you with a pet, Kefka. It wouldn't last five minutes."

"I'm not good with animals. Or children. Or human beings in general. Most of them sicken me to the point where I want to wipe them off the face of the earth."

Bellatrix laughed. She found his belligerent musings entertaining. He was so open and honest about what he thought and felt, never hesitating to tell someone what he thought of them. He might have been a cold-blooded, murderous lunatic, but at least he was honest.

She picked up the turtle and flung it back into the river.

"Hey! What did you do that for?" asked Kefka, watching as the turtle hit the water with a splash and sank beneath the surface. "I wasn't through playing with it yet."

"You said the turtle was ignorant and boring," said Bellatrix. "So why not play with something that's a bit more lively and entertaining?" She winked at him, and a smile spread across his painted face.

He quickly turned around and hurried into the tent. Bellatrix could be quite the animal herself when she wanted to be, and she was much more interesting than some lowly turtle.


	4. Language

**Chapter 4 - Language**

 _Written for Lamia's Daily Speed-writing Challenge_

 _Prompt - [quote] "He called the shit 'poop'!" (from the movie Billy Madison)_

* * *

No one was sure if letting Bellatrix stay with Kefka was a good idea. On one hand, she seemed to be the only one who could keep him under control, using her own unique brand of magic and violence to subdue the raving mad man when he lost his temper. But on the other hand, there had been more mysterious deaths and disappearances since he returned with her from the Wizarding world.

Another downside was the loud arguments and fights that seemed to spontaneously erupt from out of nowhere when they were together. Leo had been sitting at his desk one morning, minding his own business when a fireball tore through the side of his tent, ripping open the heavy canvas and missing his desk by a few inches.

Leo looked up from the papers he'd been going over, his eyes wide as he stared at the gaping hole left behind by Kefka's outburst. He could hear the two of them arguing with each other, over what he didn't know. From the sounds of it, the crazed knight was upset because he'd wanted it to rain, and he wasn't happy to see the sun still blazing brightly overhead when he got out of bed that morning.

"We're camped out in the desert," Leo heard Bellatrix say. "It doesn't rain every day in the desert, Kefka."

"There is a river ten feet from the tent," Kefka pointed out. "Which means that it must rain here."

"Why can't you just use your magic to make it rain?"

"I shouldn't have to!" Kefka shot back, enraged by her question. "I have more important things to do with my time then rain dance across the planes every time I want a little moisture in the air."

Leo groaned, his head in his hands as he listened to them argue. It was bad enough when he had to listen to Kefka's mindless rants. Now he had two of them to contend with.

He sighed heavily, pushing his chair out behind him as he stood up and made his way over to the hole in his tent. If he didn't do something they were likely to burn the camp to the ground, and it wouldn't be the first time that had happened.

"Kefka," he called out, walking towards the pair of crazed magic users. He knew he was entering dangerous territory whenever he came between these two, and approached them with caution, being wary of any random hexes or bolts of lightning that might come flying his way. "What seems to be the problem?"

The knight turned to face the general, his fists clenched at his sides as electricity crackled in the air around him. "She is telling me what to do!" he spat angrily, pointing at Bellatrix. "I told her I wanted it to rain this morning. So she started going on about how I need to use my magic instead of waiting for it to rain."

"What?" Bellatrix couldn't believe what she was hearing. "It was a suggestion, not an order. I wasn't telling you what to do."

Fortunately, Leo had a great deal of patience, and was able to remain calm even when Kefka was on the verge of having another one of his violent outbursts. It was when that outburst actually occurred that he knew it was time to panic.

"You need to calm yourself, Kefka," said Leo. "I know you don't like being out in the heat with sand on your boots, but there really is no need to get upset."

That was the wrong thing to say to him, and with a scream of rage Kefka let fly with a bolt of lightning. Bellatrix and Leo ducked as the sizzling flash of electricity flew over their heads, colliding with one of the nearby porta potties that had been set up just outside of camp. The structure exploded in a shower of green and gold sparks, sending the toilet sky high, along with some of the less savory contents that was also made airborne by Kafka's tantrum.

For several long seconds Bellatrix and Leo were silent, watching as the toilet splashed down in the river. They stared at him, waiting to see if Kefka was going to have another outburst.

"Do you feel better now?" asked Bellatrix.

"Yes," he spat, still sounding rather irritable. "Though I'd rather it was Leo's head floating in the river right now."

General Leo didn't hear him, he was too busy looking at the mess Kefka had made when he blew up the toilet. "Kefka..." he said slowly.

"What?" snapped Kefka, glaring daggers of pure hate at the general. "Don't try my patience, Leo. I've had a very trying morning and I'm in no mood!"

"But this...this... Oh, this is revolting! There's poop everywhere."

Kefka blinked, looking at him as though he didn't understand what he was saying. "Excuse me, did you just say what I thought you did?" He turned to Bellatrix, who by now had collapsed onto her butt in the sand and was laughing hysterically. "Did you hear what he said? He called the shit 'poop'!"

Bellatrix fell over onto her side, laughing even harder at Kefka's comment.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Kefka continued, his darling Bellatrix rolling in the sand behind him as he began another one of his rants. "You heavy load of stinking shit! You can't even call something by its proper name. What's wrong? Is Miss Priss too dainty and delicate to curse?"

Bellatrix rolled over onto her belly, waved her wand at him, and within seconds a foamy mass of soap bubbles poured out of Kefka's mouth, right in the middle of his profanity laced fit of rage.

The mage doubled over, coughing and spitting out soap suds. "Bella!" he screeched, foam flying from his mouth like some rabid animal. "What did you do to me?"

"I washed your mouth out with soap, Kefka," she said calmly. "While I do find your antics rather amusing, I think I've had enough of your noise for one day."

Kefka opened his mouth to yell at her, choked on a mouthful of suds, and then fell to his knees in the sand. Leo could only stand back and watch as Kefka spluttered and gasped. He then burped up a large, pink soap bubble, which started Leo laughing as the deranged knight tried but failed to spout more obscenities at him.

Leo had never seen someone silence Kefka like that. He was suddenly grateful to have Bellatrix staying with them, because she was the only person crazy enough to take on Kefka Palazzo.


	5. Wild Ride

Chapter 5 - Wild Ride

 _Written for the Color Challenge on Caesar's Palace_

 _Prompt - black_

 _A/N: this story is dedicated to Lamia of the Dark, whose stories have inspired me to start writing FF fics again._

* * *

It was a strange place, the likes of which she'd never seen before, filled with large animals that resembled a cross between chickens and dodo birds. And the smell! What on earth was that horrible stench? She wrinkled her nose as the smell of straw and feathers reached her nostrils. Surely this was no place for a pureblood.

"Damn, this place stinks," Bellatrix complained, frowning in disgust as she followed the mage into the barn. "What did you do? Kill someone and hide the body in a hay pile?"

"Not recently, no," Kefka replied.

"Then why did you bring me here?"

"I brought you here to show you some of the animals in my world. You asked me what sort of transportation we use. And while our airships are a better means of transportation than brooms, we don't always have need for such things. For shorter distances, a chocobo will suffice."

"Chocobo?" Bellatrix asked, her eyes widening as she noticed the large birds in the stable.

"Yes, this is a chocobo." Kefka gave the chocobo a pat on the head, eliciting a high pitched chirp from the brightly colored bird. "I don't like the smell either, and I never ride one of these things if I don't have too. The smell is so horrid it takes days to get the stench out of my clothes. But this is what we use to get around."

The witch walked up to one of the birds, gazing up at it as it blinked its overly large eyes at her. The bird was roughly the size of a horse, covered in bright yellow plumage with short, stubby wings. It lowered its head, the tip of its beak nearly touching her nose. They stood perfectly still, staring at each other for several seconds, when the chocobo suddenly opened its beak and let out a loud "kweh!"

Bellatrix shrieked, jumping back as Kefka burst out laughing. "It's not funny!" Bellatrix snapped. "Damn thing is nothing more than an oversized diricawl."

"A what?" Kefka was still chuckling as he watched her move away from the flightless bird. The chocobo was leaning forward in its stall, and was attempting to nuzzle her with its beak. But Bellatrix wanted nothing to do with the bird's affectionate gestures.

"Diricawl. Muggles know them as dodo birds," Bellatrix explained, taking another step back as the persistent chocobo chirped and cooed. "They're plump, fluffy, flightless birds that are much smaller than these abhorrent creatures. Muggles think they've gone extinct because - WOULD YOU GET AWAY FROM ME!"

Kefka doubled over, laughing and holding his stomach as the chocobo playfully nipped at her, its beak closing around her long, flowing curls as it chomped on her hair. Bellatrix swatted the chocobo until it finally released her and took a step back, giving her a confused look as she yelled and cursed. It didn't know why she was so upset. All it wanted was to be her friend.

"They're not all like this, are they?" Bellatrix huffed, smoothing her hair as Kefka continued to snort and giggle. She then noticed a black chocobo in the stall at the opposite end of the stable. Its glossy black plumage resembled that of a raven, and she felt immediately drawn towards this creature in a way she hadn't been with the yellow ones.

"It depends on their breed," said Kefka. "The yellow ones are light hearted little nippers, but the white ones - hey, where are you going?"

Bellatrix wasn't listening to him. She was already making her way towards the stall in the back where the black chocobo was preening its feathers. She could tell by looking at it that this chocobo wasn't like the others. It's mood and disposition was different, and it leaned back in its stall when she attempted to pet its head, glaring at her suspiciously as though it didn't trust her.

"It doesn't like me," said Bellatrix. "The other one acted like it was madly in love with me."

"Why don't you try feeding it?" Kefka suggested.

"What do these things eat?"

"Gysahl greens," the mage replied, pointing to a sack of vegetables in the corner near the stall. The vegetables looked like carrots, except they were gold instead of orange.

Bellatrix plucked one of the vegetables from the bag and held it up to the chocobo. "Come on, you stupid thing. Eat the damn carrot."

Kefka put his hand over his mouth, trying his best to stifle a fit of giggles as the witch poked the chocobo with the carrot. "You're not very good with animals, are you?"

"Of course I am. I get along just fine with you, don't I?"

"Oh, very funny, Bella. Though I don't suppose you'd like to ride one these animals, now would you?"

Bellatrix raised an eyebrow, looking at him as a smile spread across his painted face. "Really, Kefka? You're suggesting that we do that here with all these birds watching us?"

This sent Kefka into a renewed fit of laughter. "Not me, you idiot. Them! Though I wouldn't be opposed to such a thing if that truly was your intent."

Bellatrix jabbed the black chocobo with the carrot, and this time it snapped at her, chomping down on the vegetable and nearly taking her hand off in the process. She took a step back, rubbing her hand as she looked up at the monstrous bird. Another inch or two and the chocobo would have bit her fingers off.

"I want that one," she said. "The yellow ones are far too sweet. It's annoying."

"Wonderful!" Kefka pushed her aside and opened the stall door, leading the black chocobo out of the stable. He didn't bother telling her that the black ones knew how to fly. He thought it would be better if she figured that out on her own.

.oOo.

The mage brought the chocobo outside, where he attempted to help Bellatrix up onto the creature's back. This lead to some problems, as well as a great deal of shouting and cursing, until finally the witch was seated on the chocobo's back.

"How do I make it go?" she asked. The chocobo had wandered away from the barn and was nosing through a patch of grass. It seemed more interested in searching for bugs than taking her for a ride.

"It's easy," said Kefka. "All you have to do is send it running with a slap on the ass. Just remember to hold on tight and don't pull out any of his feathers, because he won't thank you for that." He pointed at the black feather in his ponytail. "Trust me on this. I know what I'm talking about, Bella."

Bellatrix took hold of the reins, and Kefka gave the bird a smack on its feathered rear, which startled the poor bird and sent it running down the hill. Bellatrix screamed as the chocobo's feet pounded the earth, jostling her as it ran across the uneven hillside, while Kefka stood there laughing at the sight of the witch clinging to the chocobo for dear life.

The chocobo was picking up speed, its wings outstretched and its head down as it ran. It hit a bump in the road while it was running, and Bellatrix flew out of her seat just as the bird launched itself into the air. The next thing she knew they were rising above the trees, the chocobo's wings beating beneath her as she clung to the reins with one hand, her arm around the chocobo's neck and her butt in the air. She had landed wrong and was hanging sideways from the reins, her left leg over the chocobo's back and her right knee digging into its side.

Grunting with exertion, she managed to hoist herself into the saddle, tugging on the reins and cursing while the chocobo let out a shrill cry and tossed its feathered head, trying to throw her off. But she was determined to stay on this blasted thing, and tightened her grip on the reins as the chocobo circled back and made for the barn.

"That's marvelous!" Kefka cried, backing up and giving the chocobo room to land. "My dear girl, you're a natural. For a moment I thought you were going to fall and crack your skull open. But you maintained your balance and held on for the duration of the flight. Well done, Bella. Well done!"

Clouds of dirt and dust kicked up beneath the bird's feet as it landed next to the barn. The witch on its back was glaring at him, and was furious with Kefka for sending her off on a wild ride without telling her that the bird was capable of flight.

"Kefka!" Bellatrix snarled. She tried to dismount the chocobo and fell off its back, landing in the dirt at Kefka's feet as the mage laughed at her less than graceful dismount. "You didn't tell me that they could fly! What were you doing? Trying to get me killed?"

"No, of course not. Believe me, if I wanted you dead we wouldn't be having this conversation right now." Kefka offered to help her up but she turned down his offer, making a rude hand gesture before standing up and brushing the dirt off her dress.

"I'm never riding one of those things again," she spat. "And if you think you can get me back on one of them, then you're completely out of your mind."

Kefka grinned. "Well, in that case I'll be sure to book your next flight for tomorrow morning."


	6. Pyromania

**Pyromania**

 _Written for the Rebirth of the Daily Weird Prompt Thing_

 _Prompt - firebrand_

* * *

It began with a single piece of burning wood and ended with an inferno, scarring the land and leaving behind a trail of complete and utter devastation in its wake.

Bellatrix and Kefka were sitting on the steps of the Imperial palace when Bellatrix asked to see a demonstration of Kefka's magic. The mage looked around and spied scrap of wood lying on the ground next to his feet. He held his hand over it, and within seconds the piece of wood burst into flames.

Bellatrix wasn't impressed. She frowned, looking from the piece of wood to his painted face and said, "Is that is? I was expecting something a bit more thrilling from the first ever magic knight."

"It's Magitek Knight," said Kefka. "Not magic knight. And if you really wanted a show, then you should have just said so."

He conjured a ball of fire in his right hand, and hurled it at a passing soldier who had just left the palace and was making his way down the stairs. The fireball struck the soldier in the back of the head, lighting his hair on fire, and for a few seconds the man was oblivious to growing flames burning their way through his thick mane of black hair.

And then he screamed, the flames reaching his scalp and burning through his flesh. Kefka and Bellatrix laughed as the soldier ran to the nearest water trough, next to which a chocobo was tied to a wooden stake and was poking through the grass in search of bugs. The soldier plunged his head into the trough, submerging himself in the water, and all the while Bellatrix and Kefka continued to laugh.

Kefka elbowed Bellatrix in the side. "Watch this," he said, grinning at her. "This is what I like to call a hot seat." He conjured a second ball of fire, and before the unfortunate soldier had time to recover from the first attack, Kefka flung the fireball at the seat of his pants.

A stream of bubbles erupted from the soldier's mouth, his head still submerged in the water trough as his pants blazed with enchanted flames. He shot up into the air, panicking and running through the streets of Vector while Kefka shouted, "Run, run you little son of a bitch! Run like your ass is on fire and your hair is catching! Oh, I'm sorry. Your ass really is on fire. Dear me, I hadn't noticed before."

Bellatrix held her stomach, doubling over and laughing until her sides hurt. "That's brilliant! Now I want to see what happens when you give someone a hot foot." She wiped tears from her eyes and smiled. "Well go on then. Set something else on fire."

It delighted Kefka to no end, seeing the amount of pleasure she derived from watching people burn. So he decided to have some fun and keep her entertained.

He went over to a Magitek suit of armor that a soldier was doing repair work on, and flipped a panal open on the back of the large machine. He plucked one of the silk scarves from around his neck and tucked it into the opening that lead to the fuel tank. He then lit the scarf on fire and ran.

He grabbed Bellatrix by the hand, running with her as they took cover behind a building. "Those things run on a combination of magic and electricity," Kefka explained, poking his head out from behind the side of the building. "But there's a component added to the fuel that's highly flammable. It's a solution Cid invented that mixes with the liquidized Esper magic, making it last longer so the armor won't need refueling as often."

Bellatrix watched in anticipation as the fire crept up the scarf towards the fuel tank. The soldier working on the armor didn't even notice what was happening, as the fuel tank was on the underside of the machine and he was sitting in the driver's seat, his head down as he worked on the control panel in front of him.

"Wait for it," said Kefka, crouching down and putting his fingers in his ears. "Here it comes!"

There was a massive explosion as the fire entered the fuel tank, blasting the armor to pieces and sending bits of metal sky high. A fireball erupted from the charred machine, the soldier's limbs and organs scattering in all directions as he was blown up with the suit of armor. Blood as well as chucks of flesh and burning embers rained down from the sky, painting the streets a vivid shade of red.

"Well, would you look at that," said Kefka. "I didn't know the forecast called for rain this morning." He then turned to Bellatrix and said, "And that, my dear, is how we do it in the empire. We stick a fireball up their ass, blow them up and watch the parts fly. Then their eyeballs roll around on the ground and I use them to play marbles."

The crazed magic users retreated to a far off corner of Vector as General Leo and a handful of soldiers came running to see what the commotion was. Once they were alone in a secluded spot behind the city's inn, Kefka asked her about her magic. He was curious as to whether or not she could conjure fire, and wanted to see a sample of her magic.

Bellatrix smirked. She rolled up her sleeves and withdrew her wand from a pocket in her dress. If Kefka wanted fire she'd gladly give it to him in the form of a powerful curse known as Fiendfyre.

She held her wand aloft, and conjured a stream of intense flames that rose twisting and writhing into the air. The stream split in two, then divided again and again. One stream exploded as a chimera formed from the gushing waves of rippling heat, another formed into a massive roaring dragon, its gaping maw spewing flames high into the air, while another stream of fire split to become a mass of snakes.

Bellatrix flicked her wrist, causing a jet of flame to shoot from the tip of her wand and form into a flaming animal. Using this technique she was able to conjure a hoard of howling wolves, snarling dragons and even a phoenix that spread its wings and took to the skies.

Kefka watched in awe as she sent her army of blazing beasts out into the fields beyond Vector. The phoenix perched upon a tree, which instantly disintegrated into a pile of ash. The wolves tore across the plains, the flames leaping and rising at their sides, rising like waves and crashing down upon the earth, devouring everything it touched. Hoards of serpents and stampeding horses scorched the earth, blackening the plains as ash rained down from spiraling towers of smoke.

Not wanting to be left out of the fun, Kefka raised his hands above his head, laughing as he conjured a ball of fire that was nearly fifteen feet in diameter. He sent it soaring through the air, joining the mass of flaming serpents and dragons. This resulted in an explosion that shook the earth for miles around, as the fires merged to created a tidal wave of destruction.

The raging inferno raced across the plains, consuming trees and wildlife, melting boulders and evaporating streams. The unfortunate creatures that were caught in its path met their end before they had time to react, the roaring flames burning through flesh and bone, until nothing remained of their victims but ashes on the wind.

This was what happened when Bellatrix and Kefka joined forces, their combined magic devastating the land for miles. It was bad enough when the inhabitants of Vector had Kefka to deal with, but now they had two pyromaniacs running wild in the streets, setting fire to anything and anyone that got in their way.


	7. Salvation In the Dark

**Salvation In the Dark**

 _Written for the Monthly Oneshot Contest on Caesar's Palace_

 _Prompt - in your tears and in your blood / in your fire and in your flood / i hear you laugh, i heard you sing / 'i wouldn't change a single thing' —- til kingdom come, coldplay_

* * *

She wanted him, she needed his sadistic ways, his love of chaos and death. This vicious demon, her very own heartless angel wrought from the swirling torrents of Hell. The fires that burned below shone in his eyes when he held her in his arms, a wicked smile spreading across his face as his nails scraped across her skin.

Breathless, she called to him, whispered and moaned his name in the flickering candlelight that surrounded them. This unholy union of the darkest forces on earth, of sinful pleasures and carnal delights, could only be found when she embraced the body of a god.

Her god, Kefka Palazzo, whose name was enough to make whole civilizations tremble with fear. It wasn't enough to love him, to call his name in the height of passion and writhe beneath his nude form. He was a god, and therefore he must be worshipped. But Kefka wasn't satisfied with the actions of his followers, those who prayed and praised his name at the Cultist's Tower. He wanted something more, something only she could give him. For she was the only one who would love and worship him with her body and soul.

He would lay her down upon silken sheets that were as black as the cold winter skies, leaning over her as the tips of his feathered wings brushed against her warm skin. His touch made her shiver and he chuckled softly, caressing her cheek with his soft, delicate feathers.

He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close and enveloping her with his body. This was something more than passion. It was love in its purest form, but it was also the divine love of a god for his most beloved queen, a dark witch whose heart was painted blacked with hatred and corruption. Only Bellatrix, who found beauty in death and decay, in the anguished cries of a thousand dying souls as they perished in the fires conjured by her lord, could truly love this magnificent winged demon.

She lay beside him, his arm around her as she felt his heart beating next to hers. The warmth that radiated from his skin was like that of the sun, the morning star that rises from the sky to light the heavens at dawn. The warmth of his soul and the fire within soothed her, shielded her from the harshness of winter as the snows fell outside their bedroom window. She was his most precious treasure, and he would protect her, keeping her safe in a world of desolation.

These lands that had been forsaken by their god, laid to waste and shattered beneath his Light of Judgment. She was his flower that blossomed in the night, and he was her salvation in the dark. She stood alone in her beauty, in the fierceness of her heart. Her savagery mirrored his own, her spirit wild and untamed. There was nothing like her, not in heaven or on earth, that mimicked her unbridled fury.

"You're magnificent," said Kefka, smiling as he gazed into her eyes. "A sumptuous beauty. You make me want to ravish that lovely body of yours until the sun comes up."

He wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her close as the snows continued to fall. She closed her eyes, and Kefka heard her softly murmur, "In your tears and in your blood, in your fire and in your flood. I hear you laugh, I heard you sing. 'I would not change a single thing.'"

"Reciting a bit of poetry, Bella?" Kefka asked, looking pleasantly surprised to hear her say such words.

"Mm-hmm." Bellatrix nodded, her eyes still closed as she snuggled against his chest. "It's one of the songs I hear them singing at the Cultist's Tower. Sometimes they do more than shuffling about in circles, praying to you night and day. They praise your name in poetry and song, chanting the same lyrics over and over."

"Yes, I'm well aware of their hymns and chants." Kefka glanced out the window in the direction of the tower that lay nestled in the mountains of Serpent Trench. If he listened closely, and focused on the cultist's voices while filtering out the other noises in the world, he could just make out the distant songs rising from the tower. "Though I think I could do better than some of the songs I've been hearing lately."

Bellatrix opened her eyes, looking at him expectantly as she waited to see if he would sing something to her, or recite a bit of poetry. And then he began, speaking softly to her as he sang one of his favorite songs.

"Perhaps there is truth in madness. It asks me for sustenance, but I have been feeding it since the day I was born. Or so say the sands of time, with worms consuming the carcass of my content, slowly festering in my mind. Betwixt immortal decay and severed remains, deepening shadow and towering flames. Scream if you will and call me insane, for I have found the truth within myself."

"That's beautiful," said Bellatrix, her eyes drifting closed once more. "You always sing the sweetest lullabies, Kefka."


	8. A Gift From God

**A Gift From God**

 _Written for the Rebirth of the Daily Weird Prompt Thing_

 _Prompt - angel wings_

* * *

She was there when the world fell into ruin, when all things came to an end. She watched him rise above the chaos, spreading his wings and casting his light upon the world. Of the many who were there to witness his rise to power, few lived to tell about the day Kefka became the God of Magic. She survived because she was his greatest treasure, because she was the one thing worth protecting in this world.

But this was only one world, one war. He knew there were others, and that she could not stay for long. The world was shifting and changing, as the cataclysm brought about by the world's destruction opened the sealed gate to the Wizarding World. Their worlds began to meet and blend, merging into one as the world of balance slowly crumbled. She knew it wouldn't be long until the war from her world spilled into his. But Kefka was ready. He had conquered his own world easily enough. Now the time had come for him to entend his reign beyond the horizon, to other planes of existence that lie just beyond the borders of his world.

He knew she would stand beside him as they went to battle, and he smiled, thinking about how much she was like him. The only thing that could come close to her undying love for him was her love of death and destruction. He could tell her no, and forbid Bellatrix from participating in the battle of Hogwarts, but it wouldn't do him any good. She didn't take orders from him. She was the only one who could stand up to him and live to tell about it.

Kefka knew how much she enjoyed mindless destruction. He wouldn't forbid her from doing the one thing she loved most. But despite her strength and skill in battle, he knew it would be dangerous for her to leave his tower. This wasn't the same world it had been when they first met. Monsters from both her world and his were roaming across the empty planes in search of their next meal. There were ancient beasts, dark behemoths and dragons, and escaped Espers such as Deathgaze on the loose. Not to mention a variety of magical creatures that had become twisted and mutated by the magic in his world. The people fighting for the light side were the least his concerns. He knew they would be no match for her. But he wanted to protect her from the monsters lurking in the shadows.

Long ago he made an enchanted crown for Terra, using it to control her, forcing her to become his slave. Living in a world where magic and technology came together had given him the knowledge and skill needed to create enchanted relics and artifacts. It wouldn't take much to make something for Bellatrix, something that would protect her and help keep her safe.

He sifted through his collection of treasure, through ribbons and celestriads, rings, pendants and bracelets. He even considered giving her the Soul of Thamasa. But her magic was different, which meant that many of these enchanted relics were of no use to her. The ribbon could be useful, but he wanted to give her something more, something special. And then he saw it, a ring adorned with a pair of silver angel wings, and he knew exactly what to do.

Kefka started by removing the charm that had been cast on the ring. He knew that Regen wouldn't have any effect on her because Bellatrix's magic didn't diminish with use. He imbued the ring with the same protective elements as a ribbon, then enchanted it with a healing spell that would automatically cast Cura and heal her whenever she was injured in battle. He also added a protection spell to lessen the amount of damage she received from her enemies.

When he had finished casting protective charms on the ring, he added two extra pairs of wings to the silver ring. The first set resembled the original pair of silver angel wings. The second pair was dark, and looked like a pair of black bat wings. Now the ring had three sets of wings that closely mirrored his own, making it the perfect gift for her.

He presented Bellatrix with the ring, and explained to her about the charms he'd cast on it. He said it would protect her, and that it was a way for her to always keep him by her side. It was a precious gift from god, and it was Kefka's way of making sure he would always be there for her, watching over her, no matter where she went.


End file.
